Oct. 25, 2010
Chico, CA
Ignoring police warnings for outsiders to stay away from Chico on Halloween, the once and future governor of California, Jerry Brown, will be bringing his Moonbeam Express Volkswagen Bus Tour to a downtown rally on Sunday at 10:30 a.m.
This will leave plenty of time for Brown to participate in traditional Chico Halloween festivities like the downtown Treat Street, trick-or-treating at the brewery ("All I got was a Bock"), costume contests (he plans to dress as a princess) and a cop-taunting riot.
"It's these out-of-town trouble makers that cause most of the problems," explained Police Chief Baloney, "We can't just hang their bodies from telephone poles on Highway 99 as a warning to stay away like we used to--especially if they might be the next governor. But we'll be on our high horses keeping an eye out for trouble. If he starts talking about how hot Linda Ronstadt used to be we're going to move in."
Brown's staff says the candidate plans to speak to supporters telepathically so the opposition will not be privy to his strategy. Democratic Party organizer Bob Mulholland has handpainted 5,000 signs that say "Good Job, Jerry!" and is sending photoshop postcards of Meg Whitman blowing a horse to every registered California voter.
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